ok,so i know that this is sad but since i've not been able to get on the computer the last few days i've resorted to writing good old fashioned diary entries on paper....and now i'm just going to transfer them onto here....better than having pieces of paper with this kinda stuff lying around wouldn't you agree?...I'm back dating them as well..so you know which day's which ok?....

here we go...

Valentine's day:Take 2

Sitting in an english lecture right now..my mind is wondering far FAR away from the boring balding,barely breathing man who stands talking indecipherable words.He pauses every 2 minutes to take a deep breat..there's a hope that he might say something remotley interesting..nope.Plunged back into darkest boredom.He quotes just about every English poet that ever lived but doesn't say anything about the quotes...helpful.

OK,looking around...i see people with glazed eyes,heads on desks,the girl with the newly dyed bright pink hair at the front,the guy behind me who plays with his mini disk...No on in site has any more than half a page of notes. Me?Well i probably look imensley interested in the lecture cos i'm sitting here scribbling away in red ink...if only they knew.

God! I could be using this time in so many other ways as well!I could be out the door,down the hall and up the street,finding Levi (my girl..since i have a lnk to her now i might as well use the name right?!),spending time that we lost out on yesterdayI could be booking the restaurant for tonight.I'm taking her out for dinner,it's the first time we've been out like this..a table for 2 kinda thing.I have 3 places in mind and i don't know which to go for..i've checked out availability and prices and things but i need to ask her if she wants to eat early or late...and in town or local but then again maybe i should just book?...

I'll check first..if she says its up to me then i'll just have to go for one and hope for the best.

A guy behind me just woke up with a jolt.....looked around with an expression that said "where the hell am i ?!"...realised he has saliva driping form his mouth...ew. I think i used to go to school with him.

Anyway..they're all straight places..i only know of one gay eating place near by but i've never been.I don't know what the foods like..what the prices are like..what the place is like,so i think i'll leave that for another time.

I said to my mum last night that I'd be going out tonight and she said "no gay places though..ok?"..God..it's like telling a saint not to go to heaven! If that's who you are...that's who you are....

I think he's stopped talking....thank god...